DeeDee

So tomorrow DeeDee gets put to sleep. Her body is riddled with cancerous tumors. All organs. Lungs, liver, and intestines the hardest hit. My greatest fear is that she'll die gasping and afraid. Last night I kept waking up because I couldn't hear her breathing, and I'd kneel down and she'd look dead, but I'd touch her face and she'd open her eyes at me. Tomorrow I think I won't go to work in the afternoon. That's all I want to say about that.


Outside it's hot and sunny. I still haven't gotten a job for summer. I am scared of a lot of things. I am city-sick like you wouldn't believe. I want out.